Tag: mood

It was back to work for me today.  I pulled my school bag, textbooks, laptop, pens, novels, notebooks etc.. back to the kitchen island and set up shop.  Outside the wind was howling and the rain pelted the house.  All I wanted to do was to go back to bed.

DH was working too.

But my munchkin had the day off.  He gobbled some raisins and grabbed his Ipad and controller.  Off he went to join some friends in a Mine Craft world.

I watched him, sipped some coffee, and opened my email.  The first one was from a student who has Covid 19.  His family has it too.  The next one was from a student who is “not feeling well” and emotionally drained.  A little later, I got one saying she couldn’t do her paper two weeks ago because her mom has breast cancer.

I teach juniors.  They should be worrying about SATs and maybe prom.  Instead, they are at home alone.  For some, it is devastating.

Today I spent hours making fun looking slide shows and adding what I hope my Ss will think are cool videos.  I agonized over what I was asking them to do.  Is it too little?  Is it too much?  What about “the curriculum”?

Tonight, emotionally drained, I opened an email from Munchkin’s district.  It is clear that the focus for him will be his health.  The superintendent spelled it out. This made me smile.

But then I thought about Munchkin’s friends’ parents who have complained that their kid is “falling behind” and maybe they should consider private school.  Some wonder why school isn’t taking seven hours a day.  Or why is the teacher not teaching during their regular period via zoom.

Munchkin is eleven, going on twelve.  He is a sixth grader.  Each night since this started,  he asks that I tuck him in and stay a bit.

“Don’t you want to go back to school?” I asked tonight.

“No, Mom.  The kids are jerks.”

“So you’re happy you’re home.”  I said.

He nodded his head.

“Does this whole thing still make you nervous?”

He turned and looked at me. “Yes.  My stomach gets upset.”

I share this with you dear reader, because I didn’t know how much the pandemic was affecting him.  He seemed okay during the day.  There was only one night he complained of nightmares, and I thought it was because he had been playing video games too late.  I was taken aback as I looked in his eyes and saw FEAR.  Real FEAR.

So I stayed a little longer and counted aloud our blessings.  And then I hugged him tight.

We are living in the upsidedowninsideout.  Check in with your own kids.  Maybe things seem fine, and then they might surprise you.  We are in our fifth week at home in NJ.  This isn’t fun or novel anymore.  Desperation is leaking into our shored up lives.  Hug your kid, no matter how old.

They probably need it, and so do you.

Namaste